DEVELOPING STORY "A guy walks into a bar on two feet..." So begins the most popular twenty-minute set at The Howler, The Park's only comedy club. The joke was written and is performed weekly by Dalmanik, who is widely considered to be the king of The Park's "new comedy." But as of today, Dalmanik will not be able to make that joke on the pages of The Mammalian Daily. That's because so-called "Human jokes" have now been officially banned by … [Read all...]
Breaking News
OTD in 2014—Barkettes planning reunion: gossip site
Gossip site headsNtales says it is standing by a story it posted on Thursday night, claiming that a Barkettes reunion is in the works. The site's co-founder, Hortencia Guacamayo, confirmed that she has two sources with connections to Estelle, one of the Barkettes, who have guaranteed the veracity of the story. "Without that, we wouldn't have gone ahead with it," Guacamayo said in a telephone interview this morning. "What would be the … [Read all...]
OTD in 2013—Police reinstate Shepherd, charge six LAdeH “members”
Park Police announced today that they have reinstated FCSW President Gareth Shepherd as a member in good standing of the security force. The move comes after an investigation cleared Shepherd of all charges of misconduct made by six Animals who posed as members of a group that calls itself Les Amis de Hieronymous (LAdeH) or The Friends of Hieronmyous. At a press conference held this morning, Park Police spokesAnimal Serge Malinois said their … [Read all...]
OTD in 2015—Holstein Fashion lends its support to The Park’s striped and spotted citizens
Holstein Fashion, the parent company of Designs by Holstein, is lending its name and support to The Park's striped and spotted Animals, it was announced today. In a post on the company's web site, Balbina Ko, the President and CEO of Holstein Fashion, explained the company's bold move: "Our company 'Designs by Holstein' owes a great deal of its success to our striped and spotted customers, whom we love and respect. For that reason, among many … [Read all...]
More Park News
OTD in 2015—PMoCA to exhibit Domestic Feline Art
The Park Museum of Contemporary Art (PMoCA) announced today that a new exhibition of Domestic Feline Art will open this Summer. The exhibition will be the first under recently-appointed head … [Read All About It Here...]
OTD in 2015—Dear Noreen: Humans taketh away and Humans giveth
DEAR NOREEN: I am a two year-old Canine living with a family of Humans. One of my dearest companions is a six year-old who lives in a house down the street. One day, when we were playing, he confided … [Read All About It Here...]
OTD in 2016—Shakeoff 2016: “If you have a coat, share it with those who don’t!”
The first Shakeoff of 2016 begins at ten o'clock this morning. The semi-annual event, formerly known as the Shake for Charity, is "all about Animals helping Animals," says organizing committee head … [Read All About It Here...]
Accolades from Margaret Atwood
The Mammalian Daily “Lightens The Morning Cup o’ Gloom,” says Margaret Atwood
