The Mammalian Daily

Satirical fiction in newspaper form

Lovely to look at - Book by Noreen

Canine Music Association, PHS join forces to push for Barkettes museum

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barkettes-museumThe Canine Music Association has teamed up with the Park Historical Society and members of The Park’s music community to push for the establishment of a museum to honour the life and work of Thisbe and the Barkettes.[pullquote]The Barkettes broke the species barrier when it came to music and they paved the way for the success of all other Park musicians. We are long overdue in honouring them by keeping their accomplishments alive for the next generations.—Park Historical Society president Clark Cascanueces [/pullquote]

In the current issue of the Association’s monthly newsletter, CMA president, R.F. Aarrf makes the case for the museum, writing that the disappearance last May of the set list from the first concert of the Barkettes’ Bring Your Own Bone tour was “the straw that broke the Barkettes’ back.”

“The intention was for the set list to be preserved for eternity,” Aarrf writes. “Instead, it was stolen from right under our noses because there was no security. If nothing else, this event highlights the need for a proper home to honour the group’s legacy.”

Aarrf also criticizes the decision to place the original sheet music of “Stuffed Dogs Don’t Shed” at The Park Museum.

“With all due respect to The Park Museum, this is a travesty. Not to have a suitable home for such an important piece of Park musical history is an embarrassment to the Barkettes. Shame on The Park,” he writes.

This is not the first time that Aarrf has fought for a Barkettes museum. Two years ago, he called out the Park Finance Office (PFO) for incompetence and short sightedness for not properly supporting the arts and he warned that funding cuts and ignorance threatened the Barkettes’ legacy.

This time, Aarrf says he won’t take no for an answer, nor will his ally, Park Historical Society president Clark Cascanueces. In fact, they are asking everyone to sign a petition to tell the Archons that The Park needs a Barkettes museum.

“The Barkettes broke the species barrier when it came to music and they paved the way for the success of all other Park musicians. We are long overdue in honouring them by keeping their accomplishments alive for the next generations,” he said on the Yannis Tavros show yesterday.

Beats of Burden lineup announced

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Beats of Burden logoBREAKING NEWS

With a lot of song and a little dance, this year’s Beats of Burden Music Festival is leaving very little to chance.

That’s not to say there’s anything boring or predictable about this year’s lineup. Far from it. There’s something for everyone at the three-day charity fest and that was a smart move on the part of its hosts, the Beasts of Burden.

“We looked for a real mix this year, something for young and old, timid and bold,” says lead singer Alfredo Ox.

Ox, who is actively involved in festival decisions, says the Beats has grown much more quickly than he ever imagined and he’s feeling the strain.

“We’re having growing pains,” he says. “I can’t deny that. We don’t want it to get so big that we lose the personal feel that it had the first year. But the bigger it gets, the more funds we can raise to support our refugee population. It’s a fine balance and a hard one to strike.”

This year, the festival has added comedy to the mix and Ox thinks it will go over well.

“We invited Woodruff Dalmatio to co-host with Jargonhead, who’s been wildly popular from the get-go,” Ox says. “They’re polar opposites but they get along well and they actually play off each other, so it will be interesting to see what happens when they’re performing live. I try not to interfere with the artists, so I don’t actually know what either of them plans. I’ll be as surprised as any audience member,” he says.

This year, the food will be provided by Coda, The Tabby Club, Provisions by Petrounel, Ants in Your Pantry, Florette’s Fine Edibles, and The Battering Ram Café.

And, as usual, the Beasts of Burden will take the stage every day and night and they’ll be acting as auctioneers during Saturday night’s gala auction. But there’s a surprise in store late Sunday afternoon: the newly minted group, The Crumb Seekers, will make their professional début, after getting the nod from Ox and Co. at last Friday’s open mic at The Draft.

“You’ll be blown away by them,” Ox promises. “Even if you heard them last week.”

Other bands scheduled to appear include Inktvis and Krake, Eggie and The Pigs, The Feral Four, The Canary Cousins, Banded Brothers, Spontaneous Generation, NIML, rapper Will.o.be., The Cynics, The Tweeters, Les Chiens Débraillés, GHC, The DomEstyx, and, yes, Reekabilly stars SCENTient Beings.

And that’s not to mention the “long list” of surprises that Ox has in store.

“Music, dance, art, games, auctions, and more. It will be the best Beats ever,” Ox promises.

The Beats of Burden Music Festival will take place at venues throughout The Park 18-20 September 2015.

All proceeds from the festival go toward assisting The Park’s refugees.

Stinktier drops bombshell: “I’ve always known in my heart that I was a Zebra.”

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Scentient Beings

SCENTient Being Faramund Stinktier: “I’ve always known I was a Zebra.”

It looks as though one half of the musical duo SCENTient Beings may not be what he seems.

In a live interview on the Yannis Tavros show yesterday, Faramund Stinktier, the Reekabilly singer and the duo’s composer, dropped a bombshell when he suddenly confessed to “knowing” that he was a Zebra.

The declaration took Tavros completely by surprise, he said in a post-show interview outside Toro Talk Radio, which broadcasts the Tavros show live every afternoon.

“We were talking about the Beats of Burden [musical festival] and about the success the duo has had since they débuted Reekabilly a year ago at the festival and, out of nowhere, he said that he’d always known in his heart that he was a Zebra.

At first, I thought he was joking around and I said, ‘Faramund, let’s get serious now.’ I mean, I thought we were talking about music. Then he looked at me with such earnestness and pleading, so I had to let him continue. I didn’t know what to say. It wasn’t rehearsed…at least, I don’t think so. It was more like some cork just popped and there was no containing it anymore,” Tavros said.

Stinktier didn’t backtrack, even though Tavros gave him the opportunity to do so.

“He could have turned it into a joke and everything would have been fine, but he really wanted to tell his story, so I let him,” Tavros said.

That story, it seems, began years ago but reached a peak last year, when Damien Skyles of The Cynics encouraged the duo to explore different kinds of music.

“I created Reekabilly out of country [music] and what I called ‘parts of our essential selves,’ ” Stinktier said. “But what I didn’t tell anyone at the time was that during the course of that musical fusion, I came to understand something even more essential about myself.”

Although Stinktier said nothing about what path he would choose in the future, Tavros said he seemed relieved to have made his realization public.

Afterwards, though, Stinktier did his best to duck the crowd that had gathered outside. But when he ran into a vacant burrow just north of the radio station, his action was met with jeers.

“Let’s see a Zebra do that!” one member of the crowd yelled at him.

Although Stinktier has not been heard from since, Alfredo Ox of the Beasts of Burden says the duo hasn’t cancelled their participation in next weekend’s music festival.

“They’re professionals and big supporters of the cause,” Ox says. “I can’t imagine they’d cancel at this late date.”

Calls to the group’s manager and to their publicist Hartwig Stinktier have so far gone unanswered.

Retired novelist’s film to open PIFF 2015

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Park Interspecial Film FestivalThe first film of retired novelist Hentrick Olifant will open the 2015 Park Interspecial Film Festival (PIFF) in October, it was announced today.

At a short press conference this morning, PIFF Communications President Leola Ocelot confirmed the selection.

“We are thrilled to announce that Hentrick Olifant’s first film, Parade, will open our festival this year. As you will see for yourselves, Parade is a wonderful mix of history and autobiography with a futuristic twist. We are grateful to have the chance to screen this film,” she said.

Ocelot said the October 1 gala screening would be the film’s début, but she could not confirm that Olifant would be in attendance.

“Since he retired from writing novels, he’s been a bit of a recluse, but we are going to try our best to coax him out for this,” she said.

Best known for his novel, Grasses, Leaves, Bamboo, Bark, which won the 2006  award for fiction at the Park Annual Literary Awards (now Chitter Radio Literary Awards), Olifant also served as a Park Archon in 2009. He was last in the public eye in April of 2014, when he announced his retirement from writing fiction by auctioning off his unused novel titles (all proceeds went to charity).

Regarded as one of The Park’s most prolific writers, Olifant said at the time of his retirement that should be decide to resume writing, it would most likely be in the form of history or personal memoir. Instead, he combined the two and chose to work in a different medium.

“I find film much more dynamic than the novel these days,” he said in a rare interview last month. “There is more to do and, thus, more scope. Yet, alas, there is less time in which to do it,” he said.

In the opening credits of Parade, Olifant is listed as screenwriter, co-director, and producer.

The Park Interspecial Film Festival (PIFF) runs from 1-5 October 2015.

Beasts of Burden to hold second pre-festival open mic at The Draft

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The DraftIt’s the pre-show to end all pre-shows.

The Beasts of Burden announced today that they will once again hold a pre-festival open mic night on Friday, September 11 at The Draft, the pub by the Wishing Well that the musical group owns.

According to their manager Ignatius Herder, last year’s open mic was so successful that they decided to repeat it.

“If this goes as well [as last year’s], they’re going to make it an annual event,” Herder says.

Originally conceived as a way to “warm up” Park residents in advance of the Beats of Burden Music Festival, which is now in its third year, the event turned into a talent search that netted two new performers at last year’s festival. In addition, the Beasts became mentors to three young musicians, one of whom has now begun a career as a merging artist (merging artists are artists who work in only one field of the arts and who collaborate with one or more other artists who work in another, distinct field).

“That was a total surprise,” Alfredo Ox told The Mammalian Daily yesterday. “Mentoring was the last thing on our minds, and now it’s front and centre.”

This year, Herder says, he’s looking forward to hearing the newest talent, but he doesn’t know if they’ll have the time to take on more than a couple of musicians or singers.

“Of course, it all depends on the quality. There are some performers that you simply can’t say no to,” he said.

The rules for this year’s open mic are the same as last year’s: the Beasts are asking those who wish to play or sing to add their names to a list that will be posted outside their pub on Tuesday morning.

“But whether or not you want to perform, it will be a great time. And be prepared to stay out all night,” Herder advises.

UWT Art Gallery, Park Museum vie for art of endangered species

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Underwater Mammal ArtThe soon to be opened new art gallery at the University of West Terrier is engaged in a battle with the Park Museum for the opportunity to house and display a selection of works by members of The Park’s endangered species.

Although some of the pieces in question formed part of the 2015 Park ART Walk in August, most of the artists whose works were displayed have to date refused invitations from The Park’s art galleries in favour of private showings, most often at their own abodes.

“Obviously, this would be a real coup for us, but that is by no means the only reason we want to house the art,” said Bibiano Montanaro, spokesAnimal for the President of the University, in an interview on TMD Radio yesterday.

“As an educational institution, we feel we are the appropriate place for this art and that’s why we are engaged in this battle. But, I must say, we didn’t think we would have to fight at all, let alone this hard,” he said.

For its part, The Park Museum maintains that its mission is to house as much as it can that is representative of life in The Park.

“That means, past, present and even future,” says curator Dorika Pumi, who failed in her attempts as curator of the Park Museum of Contemporary Art (PMoCA) to attract artists who were members of endangered species.

And although Pumi contends that this “isn’t personal at all,” many in The Park’s art world believe otherwise.

“I don’t blame her for trying to redeem herself, but I don’t think she should do it on the backs of endangered artists,” says Anastazja Koci, an alumna of the Hani Gajah School of Art. Koci, who was shortlisted for the position of curator at the UWT art gallery, says she was taught by Pumi and maintains the utmost respect for her.

“But I think she’s pushing too hard on this,” she says.

Barkettes announce collaboration with Noreen on new song called “Yield!”

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YIELD

The Barkettes’ will base their new song “Yield!” on Noreen’s 2015 UWT commencement address

BREAKING NEWS
Less than a week before the final Park performance of their “Bring Your Own Bone” tour, Thisbe and the Barkettes have thrown us a bone of our own: the announcement that they plan to collaborate with Noreen on a song based on her 2015 University of West Terrier commencement address.

In a press release issued this morning, The Park’s most beloved singing group confirmed that they have entered into an agreement with the Mammalian Daily advice columnist and UWT adjunct professor of Human Studies for the creation and production of a new song called, “Yield!”

“Every bit of Noreen’s speech was so moving and showed so much wisdom,” the group writes in the release, “but the part called ‘Yield’ touched us like no other. It echoes what we–individually and as a group–have believed in and stood for all these years. It cried out for recognition and we felt we could not refuse it.”

The press release did not offer any time frame for the creation or production of the song but, according to the gossip site headsNtales, the group has booked a recording studio in The Park for the last two weeks of November.

Don’t forget: Park ART Walk’s “Art Against All Odds” is on tomorrow

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PAW logoThe organizers request the honour of your presence at the following event:

Park ART Walk
Saturday, August 15, 2015
10:00 am – 7:00 pm

Entitled, “Art Against All Odds,” the 2015 Park ART Walk will focus on the art of The Park’s endangered species. The organizers of PAW 2015 wish to thank its partner and collaborator, the Extinction Anxiety Clinic, for its support.

The Park ART Walk is a one-day, juried art exhibition that showcases the artistic expression of Park residents. Showings will take place at participating art galleries, shops, theatres and cinemas. This year’s jury will include curators from the Park Museum of Contemporary Art and the Tortoiseshell Gallery.

————————————————————————————-

The Park ART Walk wishes to thank its sponsors:

         
  The Nut Bar       LeTwiggery     Amoltrud’s Aesthetics

       Department of Holidays, Festivals, and Celebrations

 

FF
 Founding Families Financial Corporation
ASCCBAll Species Credit and Commercial Bank
  The Tabby Club
You’ve Earned Your Stripes™

PMoCA offers sneak peek at its new exhibition, “Art of the Domestic Feline”

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[satellite gallery=1 thumbs=on]

 

The Park Museum of Contemporary Art (PMoCA) offered the public a sneak peek at its new exhibition, “Art of the Domestic Feline” today in the above slide show.

The museum will host a gala this evening. The exhibition will open tomorrow.

PIFF 2015 sneak peek: Noon Nuttiness

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Park Interspecial Film FestivalThe Park Interspecial Film Festival (PIFF) may be many weeks away, but today, at least, we got a sneak peek at what’s going to tickle our funny bones come October.

At a short press conference this morning, PIFF Communications President Leola Ocelot announced three of the films that will screen during the Noon Nuttiness portion of PIFF 2015:

SEARCHING FOR THE SPITMAN: A JOURNEY THROUGH FOAM, FROTH, AND FUN
Directed by Ernesto Santiago Camello
The Park | 23 minutes | Noon Nuttiness Première

We’re all familiar with our friend Stan the Spitman’s signature phrase, “Spitballs from Heaven!” Yet how much do we know about the Spitman, himself?

Not a lot, as it turns out. But writer and director Ernesto Santiago Camello has set out to change all that in this alarmingly candid short film about one of The Park’s funniest citizens engaged in one of the world’s oldest professions: spitmaking.

WOODRUFF DALMATIO: FINE LINES AND WRINKLES
Directed by Ludmilla Ptak
The Park | 26 minutes | Noon Nuttiness Première

Not just a hastily put together version of his award-winning book of the same name, but a film that shows the outrageous Dalmatio at work and at play, which for him appears to be the same thing.

NOT FOR POLITICAL PORPOISES
Directed by Cong Da Jiāngtún
The Park | 35 minutes | Noon Nuttiness Première

It takes a certain kind of mind to create humour out of adversity, and there’s no doubt Cong Da Jiāngtún has it.

Jiāngtún, whose own species is endangered, has written and directed this “tour of the everyday life of the almost extinct.”

“Life on the out and out,” he says in the film, “can be extraordinarily amusing.”

The Park Interspecial Film Festival runs 1-5 October 2015.

Glass shape made of nuts with strawNoon Nuttiness gratefully acknowledges the support of The Nut Bar, the most trusted nut shop in The Park.

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