Food outside The Park will soon become harder to find: DWBS
BREAKING NEWS
Food insecurity is the next big challenge Park Animals will face, according to a report released today by The Department of Well-Being and Safety (DWBS).
At a press conference held at his office this morning, DWBS Director of Public Relations Cornelius Kakapo discussed the findings of the new report, “Sources of Sustenance.”
According to the report, which was commissioned two years ago by the Archons and the DWBS, sources of food for Park Animals will become scarcer in the next few years. The report cites a number of reasons for this finding, chief among them the “increasing ingenuity displayed by the Human species.”
“It is our sad duty to report that the Human species is more intelligent than previously believed. It has developed ingenious tools to hide and, therefore, hoard its food. There will come a time in the not too distant future when our success in sourcing food outside The Park will depend mainly on Human error,” the report concludes.
Humans are not the only reason for the prediction of food shortages, though. Other reasons cited in the report include weather changes, imprudent planning, budget shortages, and lack of innovation in food sourcing.
“We have relied too heavily on old methods of gathering food,” Kakapo said the report warned. “We are at a crossroads and we need to encourage innovation in this area.”
While the report may appear to paint a bleak picture of The Park’s future ability to fulfil its own food requirements, Kakapo cautioned against seeing it as entirely negative.
“New technology, such as TulipTracker, BulbBeacon and other applications demonstrate that the ingenuity of Park Animals is equal to the task. We have faith in our own intelligence and our ability to deal with these upcoming challenges,” he said.
